Rodent's Review

Dare you to Moo

2011-08-22T23:12:00.001-05:00

Welcome to the restaurant
Welcome to the chicken
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's in line now
Everybody waits for you now
What to order next?
What to order next?

I dare you to moo
I dare you to moo
I dare you to eat at our Chick-Fil-a
I dare you to moo
I dare you to moo
Like the grease never called out
The grease never called out before

Welcome to the arches
welcome to resistance
the burgers are here
the burgers are here
between the feathers and hide see
between the tongue and your tummy

I dare you to moo
I dare you to moo
I dare you to run away from this store
I dare you to moo
I dare you to moo
Like burgers never happened
Burgers never happened

Maybe the secret is all in the fries
The ones with the waffles the ones to try
Where can you run to escape from the cows?
Where you gonna eat?
Not a happy treat.
Chicken strips are here

i dare you to moo
i dare you to moo
i dare you to buy a, buy a calendar
i dare you to moo
i dare you to moo
like the burgers never called out
and mcgriddles never came out
they never called you before

___________________________________________

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself, to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before

Original:

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself, to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before

A Safe Place to Hurt

2010-01-14T11:58:00.001-06:00

The most real person in my life is my 2 year old Luke. When he is happy you know it. His smiles are huge and his laugh is loud. When he is upset you also know it. His lip drops down and his cries begin. I really struggle with being angry at him for this. Recently I realized that if he cant share his greatest joys and hurts with me then he may go somewhere else. My older sons tend to hide their hurt more and we have to keep asking them about what is wrong. Over the span of "growing up" we learn to hide our hurts and even our joys. We get criticized and made fun of for being real. Our family should be the place we can be real and share our hurts. I realized that I am jealous of my 2 year old because he can be so real without consideration of other opinions. I think we all need a safe place to hurt. For me its in the arms of my wife. I think another great place is a small group. The church was meant as a place to be real and let down our guard. We need to be able to express our greatest joys and frustrations. Our church family should be the people to hold us in our times of need. I have struggled to stay in a small group because of my work schedule (3pm - 12am M-F). I am really thankful for Karl and Lil Welch who have visited us and helped us have a small group. We all need to feel the hands and feet of Jesus through each other. We need to feel His arms wrap us through our brothers and sisters. Let us all strive to go back to when we were young. May we all take lessons from Luke that being real is what we were made for. God bless.

You Know that Eulogy that You're Going to Write...

2009-05-26T09:41:00.004-05:00

...you need to tell them now.
Its so easy to demean people and tell them what they need to improve. It is very hard to let our pride down and tell people how much we value them. i was talking to my dad the other day knowing he needed some encouragement. my dad studied to be a pastor and has a masters degree. he worked in a barber shop and radio station for many years. he never had the opportunity to head a church. he was feeling very down. i told him that i love him and he means a lot to me. i reminded him of that great impact he has had in the lives of Pam, Holly, and myself (his children). All three of us follow Jesus and have done missions work. We have spread the Gospel and changed lives. These lives in turn will change other lives. i wanted to show my dad the ripple effect that he has had. i reminded him that there are some in ministry who neglect their children and they deny Christ. we were given a glimpse of grace through our relationship with our father. my dad once told me "you will always have a home here." my dad was very graceful when i got my first speeding ticket and helped me tear up a magazine i should not have bought. my dad has had a great impact on my life. i was also thinking about how my parents are getting older and they may be going to Heaven soon. now is the time to let them know how much i value them and not at their funeral.
i know i starve for complements and can live for two months on a good compliment like Mark Twain. i try to compliment my wife all the time. i want to convey to her how valuable and beautiful she is to me. i am her number one fan and that is my job. We should be number one fans of our spouses but we also need be fans of each other. Everyone struggles with insecurity and self esteem to some degree. Why don't we start addressing each others needs? if we can stop the cycle of constant criticism then we can start a new cycle of constant compliments. God help us to do so. You are love. Let us love like you.
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Ephesians 4:29 (Whole Chapter)

Now or the Shrink

2009-04-13T02:08:00.004-05:00

i am one to avoid conflict at all costs. i wrote earlier about how we are to confront people less often than ourselves which i still believe to be true. i struggle very much at this time with a short temper. i struggle with anger. unfortunately i take it out on my kids sometimes. i try to ask forgiveness from them and that is a prayer request for me.
i have come to realize that when you are upset with someone it really needs to be addressed as soon as possible. i was talking to Sharon and i knew she was upset with me about something. i told her you gotta either tell me now or a shrink later. when we bottle stuff up in time it drives us crazy. we either address issues now or go postal later. i think this has a lot to do with my anger issues. i tend to be passive and keep everything inside. if we can address issues with love then hopefully we can keep our sanity. my biggest fear is people with reject what i have to say or pass of my feelings as unimportant. i find though that if i share my feelings it still helps to let them out. its also good to do this with an "i love you" sandwich where we say "i love you" before and after the change we would like someone to make. this is how i want to be treated when confronted. (Luke 6:31)
Here are some verses on anger that help me keep myself in check:
"Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil."
Psalm 37:8 (Whole Chapter) (Actually found this one searching for anger)
"A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control."
Proverbs 29:11 (Whole Chapter)
"Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools." Ecclesiastes 7:9 (Whole Chapter)
The more I realize how foolish and destructive it is to give full vent to my anger i realize that self control is a better option.

Is the Conversation Over

2008-10-13T14:24:00.007-05:00

i have been talking with atheists online and it seems like neither of us really reach any conclusions. i started out by trying to share the Christian point of view but they seem to get frustrated at me as well as i with them. Solomon said there is nothing new under the sun. Atheists have their arguments and Christians have theirs. i believe this is why Jesus said that you will be my witnesses and not my debaters. Ravi stated that people rarely come to Christ through arguments. i think its best for us just to live our lives in front of people instead of trying to convince them with evidence and debate. i was chatting with someone on facebook and was very tempted to keep going back to prove myself right. i think it was mainly for my pride instead of God's glory that i continued the conversation. i just wanted to prove myself right and not help them or serve them. i left the group because the conversation was going no where. i think its best just to share with people what Jesus has done and leave the decision with them. i tend to want to white knuckle them and convince them of my position which i don't believe is Biblical (2 Timothy 2:23). Be there to answer peoples questions but when it gets antagonistic then i dont believe either of the people in the conversation are open to new ideas. My dad pointed out that an argument is a conversation between two people already convinced of their positions. A discussion is between two people open to new ideas. Jesus means everything to me and i have committed my life to him so i am not open to other religions. i do have a lot to learn. i hope i can seek to be a student.
So if you are a Christian its good to challenge your faith and learn but lets seek to show people who Jesus is more than what we know. If you are not a Christian i hope i can show you that Jesus is real. God bless.

The Bible is for me

2008-10-02T22:54:00.007-05:00

No really not you, me. Ok, ok let me explain.

When i read the Bible i am tempted to see what other people need to change about themselves. i tend to play the pharisee and want to moralize all those around me. But the Bible is not for you its for me (read that out loud) Its not for you its for me. When i read "When words are many sin is not absent." Proverbs 10:19 its not for my friend, my neighbor, my mom, my dad or my friend. Its for me. The Bible is speaking to me saying "Ethan (your name here), shut your mouth and listen."
My prayer is that God will help me read the Bible and let it sink into my heart from my head. This is a theory (disclaimer: about to justify path of least resistance from a man who loves it) but i think that 9 times out of 10 God meant me to read the Bibleand just apply it to my life. Paul confronted Peter on being racist and backing away from the Gentiles. (Galatians 2:11-13) Jesus confronted the pharisees about being white washed tombs. (Matthew 23:27) I think confrontation is necessary but for the most part I believe God wants to speak to us and confront us on our actions.
I have had friends in their marriage want to confront their spouse and always talk about their faults. I think the best thing for marriages and relationships in general is to stop pointing fingers at other people and using verses on them. The Bible is sharp, it cuts, and hurts. When i do confront someone with the truth i cut them. i perform heart surgery. Heart surgery is to be done very delicately. Heart surgery is necessary probably about as much as confrontation is. Lets remove the lies in our heads that we always have to be on the offensive. Lets offend ourselves. Lets disobey ourselves and let the Bible cut us. I believe if people saw how much we were cut down and lifted Jesus up. We could change the world. So lets change it.

Confession: After the first draft of this blog post i did change a bunch of pronouns from we to i.

Disclaimer: This blog post may violate Ecclesiastes 7:18. i guess i am at a point in my life where this is the extreme i swing toward. feel free to confront me if necessary. :)

Confession 2: i have not arrived. please pray for me :)

Life Verses

2008-09-01T00:20:00.005-05:00

Some people have life verses but i think in my case i am going to call them focus verses simply because they keep changing. It looks like they change about once a decade. (this sounds like something out of Stuff Christians Like :)

Romans 8:38-39 (Whole Chapter)
38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

This was the first focus verse i had when i was younger. i really needed to understand God's grace. i really needed to understand how He loved me. i clung to this verse knowing He would cling to me.

2 Corinthians 4:18 (Whole Chapter)
"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal."

This verse was when i fell in love with philosophy in college. i had a philosophy course at Liberty University. it gives a focus of where our eyes should be fixed. It gives an outlook on life. it helps us forget material stuff that doesn't satisfy nor will last.

Mark 10:45 (Whole Chapter)
"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

Tonight i saw the movie Traitor with my wife. i have been thinking about this verse before this night but Traitor really gave a good glimpse of the peaceful side of the Muslim and Christian faith. it showed a devout Muslim standing for his beliefs which was the main focus but i do like how it included Christianity. my wife sometimes questions whether i serve her too much. (quick point on relationships - keeping score is never a good idea.) this verse gives me so much peace. for so long i have been anxious about sharing my faith and building my career. i have heard it said a few times don't just do something stand there. another way to put it is we are called human beings and not human doings. this verse challenges me with my Savior's mission, namely to serve. if this verse can be the focus of the next decade of my life i think it will dissipate the anxiety and give me a mission. i also have been frustrated with lack of control of my mouth and being angry lately. i've had a short fuse. i think this verse will help me to just be. Jesus was a servant. ethan is a servant (not on the same level of course). if i can define myself as that than my life will be the Gospel to others and i will not have to be frustrated about what job i have.

if God gives me another decade it will be interesting to see where my focus verse goes or maybe it just takes me that long to learn :). i challenge you, my friend. What verse defines you these days? You may just need grace or to lift your eyes to Jesus. This maybe a call to start focus verses instead of life verses or maybe God has given you a Scripture so precious to hold on to longer than i can. :) either way may God bless your journey through this Broken Place.

The Broken Place

2008-08-05T16:04:00.002-05:00

Sometimes i read over previous posts on this blog and think "am i painting an ideal world that is out of reach?" in this post i would like to acknowledge that we live in a broken place. we are cursed with sin. people lie, cheat, steal, and hurt each other. people are abused and abuse. sometimes it just hurts. sometimes we just gotta cry. i guess i look around the landscape of my relationships. i have prejudged people at church. i think they do have it all together until one day i find out they live the broken place to. there is so much hurt. there is so much pain.
i guess i just want to be superman or God and just wave a wand and fix it all. i have tried to talk to people on forums and show them Jesus. i have tried to live it at work and at home. i just wanted to post this to acknowledge the broken place. i also want to acknowledge that i'm not the Savior. i hope someday i will grasp that. i cant heal everyone's wounds or live up to this ideal some people think i do. i grew up the church and some people have this crazy idea that i have it all together. when its time to reach out to another don't forget the broken place. don't forget the Healer. God bless.

Desire humility - check blinker

2008-07-31T17:26:00.004-05:00

As I drive down the interstate every once in awhile I will see someone with their blinker on who is clearly not going to switch lanes any time soon. Of course my natural reaction is to criticize until I remember to check my own blinker. I have in the past been the guy in the car with his blinker on for a series of exits mainly because of loud music. I am not sure where I heard this or if God just impressed this on my heart but the best way to maintain humility is when criticism of others flows through your brain check your own life for the same fault. (that was probably a run on so feel free to correct me) Pride is so easily slipped in to our thoughts and fed. God opposes the proud (Proverbs 3:34) so here is how we can starve it. When I hear someone curse I have to look at my own mouth. When I hear of someone divorcing or criticizing their spouse I need to check my own marriage. When I hear of someone stealing I need to check my bank account. God keep us humble. You are so great and awesome.
I think if we would show humility more that shouting at people about their sins it would help spread the Gospel. Chris Brown was a youth pastor at Northside Baptist Church when I attended. He once told the story of a Marilyn Manson concert being visited by a local church. Were they there to protest you make ask? No. What they were there to do was serve Dominoes pizza and sodas to the people waiting in line. That story has so impressed me as to how the Gospel needs to be spread. I think it needs to be spread not by shouting Christians but serving Christians. They will know we are Christians by our love. If our neighbors feet were a lot cleaner I bet they would consider visiting our church. Lets get out there with our wash basins and towels (John 13) brothers and sisters. Put down the mic. Step off the soap box. Buy a smaller Bible and let people read your life. Now to not be a hypocrite, Ethan you do it to. God bless.

I am prejudice

2008-06-27T21:03:00.006-05:00

I recently came to terms with my prejudicial, racist self. I prejudge people all the freaking time. I take one look and size them up. I look at their clothes, hair, piercings, tattoos, teeth, and skin color. I think I am just really lazy. I don't want to sit down and get to know someone (Move: The Second Chance). I think this is a common problem that we all share. I think prejudice just boils down to laziness. If we would take the time and sit down and talk to someone we would find out how much like and unlike us they are. We are all human. We all want love and respect. We want to feel valued. We like action, comedy, horror, war, love, peace, and cartoons. People have different tastes but it all boils down to the human experience. I thought about this recently with the whole Spike Lee/Clint Eastwood thing. Lee was accusing Eastwood of being racist in his war movies for not having blacks in them. You know what Lee we are all racist. White people size up blacks. Blacks size up whites. Mexicans size up Asians. The list goes on and on. Rodney King once said "Can't we all just get along?" I say to Mr. King that we are sinners. Our current state is racist, hateful, and prejudice. But, Mr. King, if we grab a hold of the hand of God, who is love, then yes Mr. King, I believe that we can.

Lie Focus

2008-06-27T20:42:00.007-05:00

There are many things that are true but the lie is that we must focus on them. Is it really wise to fill our minds with the latest negative news? News that's questionable as to the bias it represents. Is it really wise to fill our thoughts with negativity about people? Is it wise to always look at others speck with a plank hanging out of our eyes (Matthew 7)? I know I struggle with this. When I am hearing something negative about someone or saying something I think "Would they want me to do the same?"(Luke 6:31).
I think the plain battle comes down to truth and lies in our mind. Are the thoughts running through my mind coming from truth or are they lies? If they are "truth", such as focusing on a persons weaknesses, should I let them go or change the subject? We tend to focus on the negative in other people. Our battle is not against other people though. Our battle is against rulers, principalities, and powers of darkness. (Ephesians 6) As my favorite verse goes, "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18.
The Word of God challenges us to focus on that which is lovely, pure, and holy. Philippians 4:8. Our flesh tends to focus on the negative and what we don't have. The Spirit of God wants us to focus on Him. Jesus is wonderful, beautiful, powerful, and good. People are made in the image of God. Everyone has faults. Everyone has triumphs. If you want to hate someone just focus on their faults. If you want to love someone focus on their triumphs. We are all equal at the Cross. (James 2:10)
I challenge you. Take a step back from your thoughts and watch them go by. Are they lies? Are they truth? Is God pleased with them? Out of thought flows action. Lets start the battle at the root. God bless my friends.

Something to hold on to

2008-05-16T18:10:00.014-05:00

If you are like me you think about your faith a lot. (if you dont you are welcome to read anyway :) i don't know about you but i are tempted to give people the health and wealth gospel which is cleary untrue. i want to tell people that Jesus will make everything better and everything will be sunshine. i want to tell them all their relationships will be rosy and they skip down their candyland path to all the chocolate goodnes. (i love chocolate) of course Jesus promised us trials and tribulations. (John 16:33)

i guess we are tempted to "sell" Christianity. we want to put it in a nice package with a bow and hand it to everyone on the street. i want to tell people i've got it all together because i am a Christian. i want to act like i got it all together. my wife and i had a marital adjustment Sunday morning and we didn't make up before church. when we sat next to each other i tried to be affectionate but she would have none of it. i tried to be fake and Sharon called my bluff. Man i wish i could quit this desire to be fake and hold my pride.

i guess what i would tell people who don't know Jesus is that He is something i can hold to when the storms of life are raging around me. There have been many times in my life where i felt like i had reached the end or just want to give up. i have been able to turn to God as a foundation and source of strength. He has given me a reason to live and serve others.

i guess i want to give them something they don't already have. Eternal life isn't so tangible and i want to hand them something now. i am just amazed by God as well. He has blessed me so much with the family i have and a job to support them.

Wow, Jesus is so beautiful, so awesome, so incredible. i guess thats my sales pitch. His blessings are amazing. His Word is true. He is God. You will be absolutely amazed when you meet Him. i guess my "sales pitch" should revolve around Him, huh? pride is so worthless and destructive. God please humble me. If you read this far pray that He will continue to do so.

God bless.

Why Marriage is Hard...

2008-04-25T21:23:00.004-05:00

Bleed out

She dances so beautiful
Knife in hand
Her speech swings
Opening my chest

Her smile so lovely
I watch her dance
But still I bleed
From her speech

Pain rushing in
Wound begins
Pulling her knife back
My love my friend

Why do you dance
So beautiful I see
A bloody knife dripping
Was once in me

Loss of blood revealing
When best friend cuts
The wound I feel is deepening
No healer do I see

So I drown in the pool
Created by my love
Want to love her deeply
As I die

Sharon my beautiful wife gave me permission to share this poem i wrote her. We were having a conversation one night and she made a comment that just cut to my heart. I at first covered it over because i hate to discuss conflict when the wound is fresh. i told her i was fine. i then did not respond to her im's or email for a few hours. i was at work. i wrote her the above poem because i wanted her to understand how i felt. i didnt just want to say to her "you hurt me." i wanted her to feel how i felt. this is why i think marriage is hard and people give up on it. you love someone so deeply and then when they hurt you its like no pain you have ever felt. i love my wife deeper and deeper each day. God has given me a wonderful gift in Sharon.
I hope you can use the above poem in your own marriage. Let them know that you still love them deeply but they really cut you when they insult you. i think if we can survive these then we can truly deepen our relationships. Be the Number One Fan.

To my wonderful wife - may our years be many and the joy outlast the pain.

Woe is me...

2008-04-17T02:30:00.010-05:00

Matthew 23
Man I am a pharisee. I have a great fear that our Christian subculture is a pharisee factory. God gave me the perfect wife in Sharon. She did not grow up in this subculture and she has an outsiders perspective on the whole issue (more on that later). Where do these thoughts come from? It all started with me and Christian music. In the 90s my pharisee attitude was towards those who listened to anything but Christian music. I probably wouldn't have admitted it then but now i am in the confession booth.
I know all the right things to say and how a Christian should act. I have never taken drugs, never really drank (did try a sip of Daiquiri, didnt like it), and didnt have sex until i was married. I never started out on the party scene. I have gone to church almost every sunday since i was a boy. I try not to swear although i can't say i haven't. For the most part I hold my tongue. You know what all that is? Rubbish. Thats what Paul calls it and he was even better than me. He was the pharisee of the pharisees. He followed all their rules and laws. He was way "better" than me. He considered all of his accomplishments garbage. Excrement. (Philippians 3:1-13)Do you know why? I am finally starting to learn. Every time we put the spot light on our accomplishments it is taken off of Jesus. You know what our nature is? To always bring the spot light to us.
Sharon does point out that I have avoided many of the pit falls that most out of the church fall into. By the grace of God Sharon and I were pure until our wedding day. That is awesome but do you know why we were? Jesus. Plain and simple. I could have stopped before the name above all names, Jesus and then you could have been impressed with me. I can't tell you how many times I was on my knees before Sharon and I were married begging God to keep us pure. In my nature I didn't want that. I wanted to have my selfish desires fulfilled right now. God in His mercy held us back and allowed us to remain pure. We have an awesome marriage. Is it because of Ethan? No way. Is is because of Sharon? No way. It is only by the grace of an all loving, all knowing, all powerful, all merciful God. We have four wonderful, beautiful children. I can only point up to Heaven and thank God for that.
The reason I say our subculture is in danger is because we teach over and over how people are supposed to live their lives. We don't teach how to relate to those of different faiths. I felt like I never knew how to relate with other people that were outside the church. I knew how my life was supposed to be lived but then when I saw other people not living that way my natural response was to judge. I am afraid of "secular" people. I am afraid of "worldy" people. I don't know how to relate to them. Part of the fear comes from knowing my own nature and if i get to know them i will let it dive off the deep end into sin. I think another part of that fear may come from prejudice. I don't know someone very well. I only see their outward appearance and the way they talk. I immediately mark them as secular and pass them off as someone I can not relate to. God please save me from myself!!! Please pray for me as you read this. I still struggle. Jesus reached out and touched the prostitute. He loved the tax collectors and sinners. The pharisees were condemning these people and I have stood with them. I have such a great hope in my Lord. They need Him so desperately but not any more than I do. They have sinned and they are broken but no more than I was. Woe is me... as Jesus said about the pharisees. He said they were whitewashed tombs. Outside they look so good but inside they are full of dead mens bones. Their cup was clean on the outside but inside full of filthy desires. I am the exact same way. I may have remained pure until my wedding day but I still struggle with lust. I may have never really drank alcohol but I am a glutton. Jesus was the most harsh to the pharisees. He may not have reached out his hand to me. I probably would have been the one He was angry with. He would have been turning over my table and yelling in my face about how i sell out. Brothers and sisters lets quit judging. Lets tear off our robes and put down our laws. Lets reach out and hug the "sinners" (as we are also). Lets put down hate and prejudice. Lets serve those who don't know Him. Lets wash their feet and carry their burdens. Then my friend, only then, will the Gospel be preached. Let us stop telling people what we are against and start showing them what we are for. God bless.

Jesus is for Losers

2008-04-04T07:53:00.005-05:00

Song: Jesus is for Losers
Artist: Steve Taylor
Album: Squint
Year: 1993
Genre: Pop

If I was driven
Driven ahead by some noble ideal
Who took the wheel?

If I was given
Given a glimpse of some glorious road
When was it sold?

So caught up in the chase
I keep forgetting my place

Just as I am
I am stiff-necked and proud
Jesus is for losers
Why do I still play to the crowd?

Just as I am
Pass the compass, please
Jesus is for losers
I'm off about a hundred degrees

If I was groping
Groping around for some ladder to fame
I am ashamed

If I was hoping
Hoping respect would make a sturdy footstool
I am a fool

Bone-weary every climb
Blindsided every time

Just as I am
I am needy and dry
Jesus is for losers
The self-made need not apply

Just as I am
In a desert crawl
Lord, I'm so thirsty
Take me to the waterfall

And if you're certain
Certain your life is some cosmic mistake
Why do you shake?

And if you're certain
Certain that faith is some know-nothing mask
Why do you still ask?

They don't grade here on the curve
We both know what we deserve

Just as you are
Just a wretch like me
Jesus is for losers
Grace from the blood of a tree

Just as we are
At a total loss
Jesus is for losers
Broken at the foot of the cross

Just as I am
Pass the compass, please
Jesus is for losers
I'm off about a hundred degrees

Just as I am
In a desert crawl
Lord, I'm so thirsty
Take me to the waterfall

I love this song (obviously). It is a great picture of how we need to come to Christ. Jesus obviously was very upset with people who hid behind rules and laws to lift themselves up (Matthew 23). Jesus says come to me as a child believing and humble (Matthew 18:3). That is the only way to approach God. If you don't think you need God then you are not ready for Him. God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6). God please continue to humble me so I can approach You.

Jealous Kind

2008-03-01T22:41:00.002-06:00

Song: Jealous Kind
Artist: Jars of Clay
Album: Who We Are Instead
Year: 2003
Genre: Spiritual

i built another temple to a stranger
i gave away my heart to the rushing wind
i set my course to run right into danger
i sought the company of fools instead of friends

Chorus:
you know i've been unfaithful
with lovers in lines
while you're turning over tables
with the rage of a jealous kind
i chose the gallows to the aisle
thought that love would never find
hanging ropes will never keep you
and your love of a jealous kind
love of a jealous kind

tryin' to jump away from rock that keeps on spreading
for solace in the shift of the sinking sand
i'd rather feel the pain all too familiar
than be broken by a lover i don't understand
'cause i don't understand

[CHORUS]

love of a jealous kind, yeah
love of a jealous kind
love of a jealous kind

one hundred other lovers, more, one hundred other altars
if i should slow my pace and finally subject me to grace
and love that shames the wise
betrays the hearts deceit and lies
and breaks the back of foolish pride

[CHORUS]

love of a jealous kind
love of a jealous kind
love of a jealous kind

This has got to be one of my favorite songs of all time. It is definitely in my top ten (thats another blog post). What I love about this song is the exposing of our sin nature. We have all essentially committed adultery against our Maker. "Lovers in lines" are all apart of all of our lives. Jesus turns the tables for us in His anger and in His great love. No matter how many times we find ourselves that lost sheep He welcomes us with open arms though His rage is great against sin. My heart screams "How could He love me?" after finding me in bed with yet another idol. I then look to the Cross as a pool of my tears fill. Thank you Jesus that Your mercy is so great towards a sinner. Isaiah 6 is beautiful. I think every Christian should have at least one Isaiah 6 experience where we come before God saying Woe is me I am undone. As God cleans us let us say "Here am I"

I Need You

2008-02-27T20:58:00.004-06:00

Song: I Need You
Artist: Jeni Varnadeau
Album: No Hesitation
Year: 1998
Label: Pamplin
Genre: Pop

I can’t make it on my own
Can’t live all alone
I’m helpless by myself
You lend me a hand
Give me strength to stand
and somehow get me through
It’s apparent to me
(and I’m sure you can see)
I’m a woman in need

Chorus:
I need more time
I need more money
I need more advice
I need more love
I need another chance
an open hand
I need more grace
and a pretty face
I need happiness
I need an escape
I need more peace
I need to feel safe
And what this all comes down to
Is I need YOU

I try to do it well
But know that I would fail
If you weren’t there to help
You, you show me where to go
and say what I need to know
and you know how I feel
It’s apparent in me
(and I’m sure you can see)
I’m a woman in need

Chorus: I need more time, I need more money
I need more advice, I need more love
I need another chance, an open hand
I need more grace and a pretty face
I need security, stablility
I need more space, and I need more sleep
And what this all comes down to
Is I need YOU

I see again that in our culture everything is screaming from everywhere that we need something other than God. I know these thoughts race through my mind all the time. I need more time, money, advice, etc and then I will be complete. The catch is that these thoughts just repeat themselves until I am worn out and have to turn again to Jesus. Jesus is our all in all. God please help me to seek first your kingdom.

Pain

2008-02-26T22:00:00.003-06:00

Song: Pain
Artist: Grammatrain
Album: Flying
Year: 1997
Label: Forefront Records
Genre: Hard Rock

i wish that i could say i am a perfect man
i wish sometimes that i would not be who i am
one day i decided i would think on this,
not knowing if faith and pain could co-exist:

how could i ever on my own conceive
of someone i did not know, but i need?
i must be made to be at peace and communion
'cause there must be some place somehow from where I have fallen

Chorus
i find through every ounce of pain i feel
that my mind cannot deny that God is real

the inconsistency of what i say i should be
compared to what i am in actuallity
leaves me in conclusion that i know the way
though i am unable to always obey

nothing in this world has satisfied
my soul's hunger for a deeper life
the weight of my misdeeds were crushing, blinding me
i still live with pain inside but now i see

- Chorus -

- Solo -

the pieces of my life are scattered on the floor
i stared at them till i could take no more

i do not deserve to be set free
forgiveness is what i despereately need
if it wasn't for the perfect blood was shed
would i not be dead inside but i live now instead

- Chorus (2x) -

i know my faith's still here
believe through all my tears

This has really great philosophical lyrics. My favorite line is "how could i ever on my own conceive of someone i did not know, but i need?" It makes you think that God is not someone that could be designed by humans. Christianity is not a religion that humans accept. We want a religion that we are in control of. We want a list of dos and don'ts. We want a formula we can follow to get to God. Christianity does not offer that. God reached down to us telling us that we need Him.

This song portrays a growing disatisfication with self. This disatisfaction gives us evidence that there must be something more. There must be something outside of us. The song shows us that pain should lead us to God and not away.

The Truth Must Be Repeated

2007-09-30T20:50:00.000-05:00

I worked with the youth at my church for quite awhile. Through the birth of my children and family responsibilities I have had to step down. One of the thoughts in the back of my mind is that I also felt like I was saying the same things over and over. Pondering this thought some more led me to realize that the Truth must be repeated because thats what lies do. We see over and over every day in flashy ads that we need stuff. Thats a lie. We hear over and over in movies and tv shows that we need microwave relationships. (Being were you jump in and out to your liking). Thats a lie. Billboards also tell me I need stuff. Ads tell me I need to look younger. These items also imply that I need more money and to look better. Lies, lies, and more lies. The news tells me that the enemy is winning. Possibly but we all know Who wins. Lately I have turned the radio station or muted the volume on the tv when these ads came on. The reason being is that they are trying to sell me something I don't really need. They are trying to make me discontent when the Bible says that Godliness plus contentment equals great gain(1 Timothy 6:6). They are trying to tell me I need a bigger house when the Son of Man had no where to lay His head(Matthew 8:20). They are telling me to trust in myself when Proverbs says that he who trusts in himself is a fool(Proverbs 28:26). The truth must be repeated. That is why we go to church. That is why we read the Bible. Truth must be repeated and shout longer and louder than any lies in our lives. People say I have heard it all. Well my brother you need to hear it again lest the lies that you hear during the week overcome. They may overcome and deceive. I challenge you and me to look at your media diet. Do you know who is lying to you? Do you know when you are being deceived? Do you allow the Truth to be repeated to you or just lies? Take some lies out of your media diet. A good place to start is God's Word. A great web site to check out is OnePlace.com. Feed the Truth in your mind. Proverbs says to get wisdom. It also says to buy the truth and do not sell it. Run after Truth my friends and please Pray for me as I seek to do the same.

Be a Baby

2007-09-26T09:08:00.000-05:00

Inspired by the infamous baby Luke. With every child that has been born I have been reminded that I really need to be more of a baby. I need to rest in the arms of God. I need to cry to Him when I am need. I need to ask him to clean up my mess. I need to be completely dependent on Him for everything. When I watch Luke sleep in my arms he is so at peace. Jesus stated that we need to come to Him as a child. Reach little arms and stretch for your Savior. He is your hope. I also feel like a child sometimes in an adult body. I feel like a little boy trying to fill all these responsibilities that come my way. I just need to cry out and let my Daddy know that I can not do it. I know He can. God bless.

Outside of Us

2007-09-21T15:43:00.000-05:00

I recently had a conversation with a colleague at work who stated to be that he believes in himself. He had been disillusioned by the church. One argument I was thinking about is that every need we have is met by something outside of ourselves. When we are hungry we have to place food in our bodies. When we are lonely we search for a relationship in another. When we are tired we search for a place to lay down. When we are cold we need a blanket. How does this translate to our spiritual needs. What do we do when we are empty? When our heart longs for something more out of life, where do we go? Of course I find my hope in Jesus Christ. Our spiritual hunger like our physical hunger can only be met by something outside of ourselves. Unfortunately, I did not challenge my colleague's thoughts on philosophy. I do pray for him all the time. He must be hungry and his hunger can only be filled by Jesus.

Allowing Control

2007-06-19T14:27:00.000-05:00

People give a lot of reasons for not wanting to believe in or follow God. I thought about this as my wife was driving the other day. I imagine its like putting God in the drivers seat of your life. If you think about it the next time you are in the passenger seat think about someone having your very life in their hands. I obviously was fine with my wife having my life in her hands because she loves me. Think about how much more God loves you. You put your life in the hands of other people all the time. When you cross the street, ride in a car, or fly in a plane. Think of all the times you have put your life in the hands of people who don't even know your name. Now lets turn to Jesus who not only knows our name but counts the very hairs on our head (Matthew 10:29-31). Can i lift my foot over the edge and jump into His arms? Can I trust Him? A resounding yes comes from my lips but sometimes a tremble of fear still emanates from my heart. God please let me and all who read this have a heart that match our lips. God bless!

Number One Fan

2007-05-12T12:07:00.000-05:00

Everyone needs a number one fan. Why is it that one man and one woman come together? Why can't we have multiple partners going from person to person? My conclusion is that God designed us to have a number one fan. Everyone needs someone in their life that will look at their faults and their triumphs. Everyone needs someone who will take the whole of the person as they are. If we go from person to person waiting until we see their failures and then move on then we will not be doing unto others as we want done to us (Luke 6:31). Our society presents jumping in and out of relationships as the norm and the standard. While we want to go deep with a person quickly, relationships take time to develop and we need someone in our life that is constant like God is to us. For singles this may apply to just a friend but in romantic relationships marriage is a symbol of accepting someone unconditionally as God does to us. To move from one relationship to the other with no depth or just sexual interest is both selfish and most destructive. God has given me Sharon. God blessed us by helping us remain pure until our wedding day. Our first kiss was also on our wedding day as well. We made it! I am so excited to share that. God helped us to respect each other from the very beginning. We also have been privileged to have never deeply insult one another with our words. There have been times of anger and some hurt feelings but God has helped us to hold on to the respect that we had for one another when we were dating. It makes our marriage great. Too many people lose that respect in relationships and in their marriage. I encourage you to find your number one fan if you have not already. If you have a number one fan and right now it doesn't seem that way, seek to get back the respect you once had for each other. Guys open her door and write her a poem. Girls remind him of what a handsome guy you married. Build the respect back. Be the number one fan you were, bring it to the present. May your number one fan cheer you until the finish line. That is the way God meant it to be.

Peanuts on the Floor

2007-05-04T12:26:00.000-05:00

Wise words were once given to my mother-in-law - "Don't get mad grab the camera." That may be revealing as to how often we get mad as to the number of pictures are on my web site :) Just kidding. My main thought now is leaning towards the peanuts on the floor. The main culprit in peanuts being spread across our living room floor is our Sammy. My first reaction is to get upset and want to get on him about it but when I sit back and reflect someday there will be no peanuts on our floor. Someday our house will be silent. There will be no one to jump on the couch or spill a drink on the kitchen floor. There will be no fish sticks to step on that Elaina did not want. I won't be able to hear Andy's latest idea on the fun things we can do. Our children will be off living their own life. I often pray to God that I do not miss their childhood's. Andy, Sammy, and Elaina have only been given to me for a short time. So I pray again. I bow my head and plead with my Heavenly Father that as His child I can hope to be a decent father. I plead with Him that I will not miss the beauty of my children. So I say let the peanuts fly. Let them get stuck between my toes and bring pain to my feet. It is a sign that my Sammy is still there. Let the food fall to the floor. My Elaina is still here. Let the talking never end. My Andy is still here. Soon they will pass through my front door rarely to return. It also reminds me of a poem that said something to the effect of "You will tell them to be quiet and they will, You will tell them to be calm and they will. You will tell them to clean up and they will. You will tell them to grow up and they will." Today I get to hold them someday to let go. So I bow my head again and pray I will love them and serve them while they are with me. God bless.

Sin is Ugly Forgiveness is Beautiful

2007-04-12T22:20:00.000-05:00

I have found God's grace at the bottom of the rope towards the end of myself. The worst struggle I have had in my life was a struggle with pornography. There I found my heart to be twisted and ugly. I was totally depraved. I was trapped. I could not get out. My sin was very disgusting. It destroyed my mind filling it with all kinds of deceit and lies. I found that forgiveness is beautiful. I found this forgiveness on a blood stained Cross where my Savior bled for me. The sick need a doctor. The desperate need hope and a Savior. Jesus found me at the end of myself towards the bottom of my rope. He rescued me and I am forever grateful. God is good. Praise His Holy Name.

Jesus wants us to dance

2007-01-05T09:46:00.000-06:00

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Galations 5:1 Bible Gateway

Too many times people try to make us in their image but God have given us a beautiful individualism. We are created in the image of the creator. Dance my friend. Move your feet and please ignore the stares. You are free. Sing my friend and ignore those covering their ears. Your Father's ear is bent and uncovered. He wants to hear your praises.

There are people out there, modern day pharisees. They will tell you how to dress, what Bible to read, and what music to listen to. They will tell you that Jesus wants you to do this but not to do that. They will enslave you to look like them, talk like them, and walk like them. They hold the keys to your prison.

There are others who may not be Christians or claim Christ. They will tell you how to walk. They will tell you what to wear. They will tell you what music to listen to and what movies to watch. They will tell you what they want to hear. They hold the keys to your prison.

Jesus will give you rules and guides to live by. We should be moral and serve others. But He summed up the law and the prophets in this. Love God and Love your neighbor as yourself. Beyond those two commands there is freedom. Freedom to dance and sing. Freedom to paint what you want to paint. Freedom to walk out in his glorious nature and breathe in life. Jesus rules give life. Mans rules bring slavery and death.

God bless you as you dance.

The Source of Worth

2006-05-30T10:49:00.000-05:00

Peoples opinions do not change my worth. My worth is a constant thing. It is defined by the opinion of my God. His opinion is fact. I tend to be a people pleaser. I say yes many times to obligations and to bring smiles to faces. In the end I call them to say nevermind yours is now a frown.
Peoples attitudes do not change my worth. When they are upset with me my worth is still a constant. Jesus sees me as priceless. He died for me and continues to serve me with his love and power.

America's Idols

2006-05-17T20:17:00.000-05:00

Dictionary.com defines worship as ardent devotion or admiration. Where does our devotion and admiration focus on these days? Is it not the actors, rock stars, and corporate ceo's? Do we not admire them and throw our money in their general direction?

Who is the object of our worship? The finger points right in the mirror. To quote the infamous Kurt Cobain - "Here we are now, entertain us." Some times I find myself chasing entertainment from DVD's, theaters, or just toys. These idols sit all over our houses and in our minds. How do we tear them down? Truth from our wonderful SAVIOR. He states that thieves break in and steal. Moth and rust destroy as well those things we hold dear. So the question is can moth, rust, or theives touch what we worship? (Matthew 6:19-21)

What are we looking to for running our lives? What are we looking to for fulfillment? Is it in a person with a lot of money? Is it in a world that takes us away from our own? Is JESUS the center of what we do? These are questions I am posing to us, the church. Do we look different from anyone else or does our ardent devotion and affection aim for something lower than our SAVIOR?

I notice that whenever I don't feel fulfilled I will think about movies or maybe my relationship with my wife. I might think that I need to hang out with some friends and have some fun. When all of these things don't fully satisfy then and only then it seems do I remember JESUS. Pray for me and ask for me to pray for you that our devotion and affection will be for the ONE who loved us first.

A Poem

2006-05-12T11:22:00.000-05:00

the silent

nothing is heard
when hope drained
bend your ear
to sounds of pain

when focus down
i give no sound
look for a smile
see a frown

then a song
is heard again
when hope is lifted
and i find a FRIEND

JESUS my love
has opend my lips
to sing a song
no silent grip

i lift my hands
to my king
again HIS song
is the one i sing

to be a singer
is what i long for
no more silence
sing for my LORD

Selfishness Redefined

2006-04-12T07:26:00.000-05:00

"Concerned chiefly or only with oneself: “Selfish men were... trying to make capital for themselves out of the sacred cause of human rights” (Maria Weston Chapman). "
"Arising from, characterized by, or showing selfishness: a selfish whim"
According to dictionary.com these are the two definitions for the word selfishness. I believe that the word selfish or selfishness should be redefined to include that doing for one's self involves doing for others. If we were really concerned for ourselves we would worship God with our lives and serve others before ourselves. When we are mistakenly concerned with just ourselves that should be defined as death. When are main concern is just to please our selves then we are not doing life for ourselves we are working toward spiritual death.
Our primary concern according to Scripture is to please our Creator. Let His smile be the one we seek first. We should also seek the smile of those around us second. We obviously can not please everyone so if there's is a frown and God's is a smile then we are doing right. If we could grasp the mindset that solely running for our own self and stepping on others is death to ourselves and not doing for our self I think the deception would not trip us up.
We must not neglect caring for our needs. We have a responsibility to keep up our health and well being. These desires are good. The desires that are evil are the desires to built an idol to self and for us to be our only focus. I've heard a relevant acronym for joy. Jesus Others and then you last. I have the tendency to try to run after others "needs" and neglect myself so I must step carefully here.
Matthew 6:33 states to seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added. The context of this section speaks of not worrying about the needs of your life. God is going to take care of us.
As I think through this maybe it would be wiser to define selfishness as death. They are one in the same. I would like our mindset to change that when we see our mind only thinking about our concerns that we walk towards death instead of the abundant life that our Savior gives.
Let your mind be renewed by truth. Let our thoughts always press toward Jesus the author and finisher of our faith. He took our pain and that was the ultimate example of unselfishness or maybe undeathness.

2006-03-07T08:26:00.000-06:00

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